SPRING IS IN THE AIR
We’ve been opening our windows throughout the day lately. That’s how nice it has been outside.
We turn off the air in the house, open the windows both upstairs and downstairs, the curtains blow in the wind, we hear birds sing from the trees and roof tops, we see neighbors come and go from work and errands, and our pup Toffee naps with his nose pressed up against the window screen, as close to the outside as he can get from the comfort of the couch cushions.
It’s a little slice of heaven.
We’ve also been walking more in the evenings, when the open windows aren’t enough and we need to be surrounded by the beautiful day as it transitions to evening. We walked 4 miles yesterday. This has been typical for us on these warm evenings, just strolling up and down each street in our neighborhood, weaving our way home.
Right now we are thriving off open windows, fresh linens, iced coffee, blooming flowers, long walks, good books, and evening cocktails. Spring is definitely in the air and it is just what I needed.
This month I’m doing something a little different. I’ve been thinking about the things that I want out of this month and, instead of setting achievement based goals, the things that are coming to mind are things that I actually want to let go of. So here are the things I’m aspiring to do less of this month:
1. COMPARE MYSELF TO OTHERS
I’ve been journaling at the end of each month this year so far, simply as a way to get my mind in order and settle some of the things I’ve thought about throughout each month so I go into the next month with a clean slate. However, already trends and realizations have started showing themselves within my journaling. Most surprising was the way in which comparison syndrome pops up in my day to day. I, of course, knew that it popped up when I scrolled Instagram or came across design inspo. But I also realized that it popped up in my personal life constantly and was preventing me from even TRYING or continuing some of the goals I’ve had for myself previously.
Like, “Well this friend is writing a book and she has a degree in creative writing so OF COURSE she should be the one to write a book, not me.” And I literally never went back to writing my novel. Or, “Well my fitness instructor has my dream body but she trains all throughout the day and I don’t have time for that kind of exercise.” So I go into each workout already doubting myself.
It’s so counter intuitive and it seems silly to me when I actually step back and see it for what it is. I 100% need to let go of my propensity for comparing myself to others and just do whatever the hell I want to do! Life is too short.
2. GETTING IN MY OWN WAY WHEN IT COMES TO SUCCESS
Kind of piggy backing off of that last one, lately I’ve caught myself more than once literally standing in my own way when I’m about to achieve something.
I launched a new theme to my newsletter (all themes will be launching to the public soon but if you want first dibs on all the goodies be sure to sign up to our newsletter!) and this is something I have wanted for my business for years! Mike and I found one of my old planners while cleaning recently and one of my main goals in 2018 was to launch WordPress themes. 2018!!
So here I have one completely done, we had tested it, setup the demo site so people can view it working, added it to the shop, done all the things, and yet I stalled for an entire weekend. I couldn’t push the button and send it out. It just felt like too much build up and too much daydreaming to suddenly have it out in the world. Which is ridiculous because this is clearly something I’ve wanted for an incredibly long time. I literally had to tell myself to get out of my own way and let it happen. I finally did… and I can tell you now that while, yes, pushing the button to send out to my email list was scary, I’m so freaking proud that I did it. And now this new direction in my business has arrived and I get to nurture it and let it thrive!
3. BELIEVING THAT I’M INHERENTLY NOT WORTHY
Are we noticing a pattern yet? I’m kinda, sorta, maybe not always kind to myself. That’s why I’m working on it…
I’ve thought about starting a fashion blog off and on for years. I had one like 12 years ago and (spoiler alert) wasn’t very consistent with it so I slowly transitioned it into the Sweet Horizon Blog that you know today. Recently I’ve been thinking about it again. I’ve always loved fashion, even studied it for a bit in college, and miss having my style be a part of my self expression.
However, I’ve battled with my body for years and have found that my own love/hate relationship with my body is the main thing holding me back from even trying this. Shopping is already stressful for me because I think I need to be thinner in order to wear certain things or buy nice clothes for myself. But why in the world am I only worthy when/if I’m thin?! I’m still the same person that I was when I was thin. Even when I WAS thin, we’re talking 50lbs lighter, I still thought I should be thinner for clothes to look good on me.
So this tells me this isn’t a real issue with my body but more so an issue with my mind. I need to let go of this inferiority complex I have about myself and let myself just live. I should love the body that has carried me this far and learn how to dress it in ways that make me feel good about myself and empower me. I’m worthy of having nice things, of spoiling myself from time to time, and of embracing who I am, wider hips and all.
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